Adventures with D: Burnout & Compliments

11 October, 2014

It's finally happened.

I've come to the point in my relationship with D where I'm OVER IT.


Not totally over it.

Or really anywhere near over it.

Oh who am I kidding. When it comes to D I'll never be over it.

But what I am over is all the working out and keeping track of what I am eating and making sure I'm not eating certain things while making sure I eat lots of other things and blah blah blah.

I long for the day when I don't have to put so much thought into whether or not what I've planned for dinner is correct. Or if I've had enough protein for the day. I just want it to be second nature and not this huge looming black cloud over every meal decision I make.

This past week has been weird. A number of people have come to me and telling me they can tell I "definitely lost weight", that I look "amazing", "bright", and even "skinny".

When I look at myself I look exhausted, like I definitely need a nap. I'm a bit different in shape but not skinny. It's weird how the things we DON'T want pointed out are the things that folks do point out. But I'm not exactly sure anyone would know how much stronger I am or that I was able to do a pull-up by myself or that running no longer feels like a massive chore or like a rhino has taken up residence on my chest.

But I also don't mean to minimize or make it sounds like I'm not grateful for the comments. It's just completely uncharted territory that I'm not entirely sure I'm comfortable residing in.

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